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When will this be released! I've waited 4 whole month's for this to come out. I can't sleep at night because of the severe anxiety that the "The MassDrops" may have bamboozled me out my $200. I also suffer from crippling, carpal tunnel, and I'm afraid that by the time this arrives, I won't be able to feel the warmth of my grandson's face due to all the pain. Not having this keyboard mean's I'll have to type less efficiently, taking up time that I would have donated to a local orphanage. The happiness of those neglected and unwanted children is on you MassDrop! To recap, my needs are more important than anyone else here, so please prioritize my shipment, I'll be expecting it, last Tuesday.
Disgruntled and deeply hurt,
Switch to Colemak now, your pain will begin to fade and once you are using it on the ErgoDox your fingers will fly, your wrists will float, and your hands will once again be lithe enough to pull quarters from behind your grandson's ears.